That's More Like It!

The tv commercial I worked on in May has been on air for a while so now I can finally post the red bag animation I did for SureWest! The most fun part of this freelance job was animating the floppy handles. I think I got them a bit too "rubber bandy" in spots, but that's okay. Client liked it. I was so excited because this was my first ever freelance character job. Woo! I'm only showing what I worked on here, which was used for the intro and outro of the spot. It's not perfect, so let me know your notes for the next time I do a paper sack!

I totally lucked out with the bike. It was a big bummer the mountain bike I wanted was out of stock, but I convinced the guy at the bike shop to give me the same deal on a better one, with components that are quite a few steps higher than my original choice. I'm still recovering from my crash, so I can't ride for reals yet, but I did get on (with helmet) and spin around the court in front of my house. I noticed the pain in my right wrist after only a few minutes with my weight on the handlebars, so it will be a while before I can go for a serious ride (plus I have to work up to it). I have never owned a "real" bike before, so this is a serious upgrade, and will probably last years (if dogs stay out from under my wheels!). After the let down with the other bike this is more like it!

Same Luck

Got a postcard saying the bike I ordered is not happening. Same luck as everything else, I suppose. I keep trying though. I haven't found another one in my price range. Maybe the sign says Don't get a bike. We'll see.

I'm officially not going to return right away to AnimationMentor to re-take Class 6. Nothing has improved in the past month and there's just not a way for me to focus on that right now. It will be lucky if I can get some things ironed out enough to return for the Winter session in January. Meanwhile, it would be great to get some practice in, but my mouse/pen hand is still killin'. It's getting better but seems to have hit a plateau. Should be alright soon, though.

LED Toys

For some reason I am crazy about LED stuff. Don't know why. Blinky lights. LEDs use very little power, almost zero heat, and last an eternity compared to incandescent bulbs. Many cities have switched the lights in traffic signal fixtures to LEDs. Eventually LEDs may replace most of the lighting in our homes.

Some LED novelties are kinda dumb. I found this "lighted Pen Fan" on clearance the other day. I think it's silly to combine a fan and pen, but I got this thing because I've been using LEDs with my Nikon to make "art". I figured the LEDs on the fan might look cool for that.

Here's one of my older LED pix.

And here's one with the new Fan/Pen.

Holding Pattern

Workers in Sacramento County have been on strike for the past week, so I was really relieved I got my paycheck last week. I had wondered if IHSS staff were also striking. With no response from any of the people I've called or written about my IHSS mess, I phoned my case worker's supervisor yesterday. On her voicemail greeting she said, "I will be out of the office on strike...until we have a contract." Nice. Plus convenient.

I wish I could go on strike whenever my employer subjects me to BS. But can you imagine what would happen if caregivers went on stike? A lot of elderly and disabled people would go hungry, get sick, or hurt. Some of them would die. Most caregivers, however, are taking care of family members, and I doubt any would leave the person they take care of. The state and county know this, and it's one of their pocket aces that allows them to get away with crap. I/we fully have reasons to strike, but it's just not an option.

So instead of getting results I just have to wait around until the county workers' contract is settled, extending even further the already long, drawn-out ordeal of getting IHSS to pay wages they owe me back to April. It's been about 5 months, what's another 3 weeks?

A Little "Yay!" Helps A Lot

In the middle of all this crazy stuff going on, I got a nice surprise last week! Local AnimationMentor AMigos Konrad and Justin stopped by with some goodies from them and other buddies at school! Konrad made a nice card and every-buddy signed wishing me a speedy recovery from my bike smash. Just the day before I got an surprise box delivered to my door. It was from Alison, and inside a really nice book with amazing illustrations by Shaun Tan. Since then I've been getting email from other classmates wishing me well as they hear about my mishap, also cool, since I'm not on campus anymore (waa). Thanks everyone, it felt great to have a bit of "yay!"

Saturday I finally got my first "full" paycheck from IHSS, which was for work in August. The July one was screwed up and they only paid me half, and April through June I didn't get any pay at all! Grr. At least the August check was right. As if that wasn't enough, I finally got the final payment for a freelance job I did in May! Yay! I almost felt like I won the lottery or something. Okay, it wasn't nearly like that, but it was a good week, anyway.

The bike I wiped out on wasn't damaged in the crash, but it's not a very good bike. I've been planning for some time to upgrade and for a while I was very interested in these chainless bikes. Trouble is, practically nobody has ever heard of them and guys at nearly all the bike shops I went to seemed to hate the idea of a bike with no chain, less maintenance, no grease, and smoother shifting. You would think it's cuz they make their living fixing standard chain-driven bikes...oh wait, they do. Hmm. Well, since I couldn't dig up enough key info, not to mention my own concerns about the bikes, I decided to order a regular mountain bike from IronHorse. I didn't go crazy with one of their pricier bikes, but the bike I'm getting has fairly decent components and it's going to be a gigantic step up in quality from my department-store bike. By the time the shop gets the bike in and built (about 2 weeks) I should be healed enough to start riding again.

First Hand

I've never been this badly injured. Even doing bike stunts as a kid I was careful...-ish. I always saw friends or relatives slam into the pavement or fall out of a tree and break a, uh...limb (I know, puns hurt) and I didn't like how it sorta cancelled playtime. Not to mention the sudden, overwhelming sensation of ow. I fell off my bike a lot, and skateboard too, but the worst I ever got was a chipped tooth. Shamefully, I can't even boast this bash was the result of catching some air or blazing down challenging terrain. I wasn't doing a cool trick or anything, just running over a dog (which was unhurt).

Having limited use of both hands has sorta given me a direct--you could say first hand (hahaha)--experience of what people with permenant disabilities or arthritis (like my parents) go through all the time. Just doing normal things has been a big challenge. I've been trying to be careful because of the pain, but the other day I re-ouched my right wrist. It was beginning to feel a bit better but I put a little too much pressure on it one time, and OWW! Then I did it again last night, when I turned and bumped a table with the Sharpie I was holding. I've gone back to my rx pain reliever, but taking much less than the original dose, and it is working better giving some relief without side effects. Still takin' it easy, trying to be careful but healing seems on track.

The Sign Says Stop

The handlebars on my cheap Target bike are sideways after a nasty wipeout I had while on a leisurely ride last Sunday. I was on my way home pondering which shot of my AM short film to work on when a dog suddenly jumped out under my wheel right as I was passing a parked car. With no chance to react I flew over the handlebars and landed in a bad way. I severely sprained both hands, scraped my palms, knuckles, right arm, right shoulder, and banged my head. Luckily my head was the last thing to hit the ground so it was just a light bump. I don't wear a helmet when I'm riding so slow on flat residential streets. Now that I know this can happen, I will. Less luckily, I somehow cracked a rib. Sitting upright with one leg stretched out and the other tucked, I collected my thoughts. After a few minutes I decided I was okay to walk my home. Later, a friend drove me to ER.

Typing hurts, but it's tolerable depending on the keys. My hand, though, is gonna be "unmouseable" for a while. I can do a few clicks at a time but anything more ain't happenin'. My right hand is the worst, but both hands are screwy; I am having a hard time doing simple things like opening doors, windows, and taking lids off meds!

So this pretty much is the final hit to my struggle to stay with the program at Animation Mentor. I'll be out of commish for at least a week, and there's no chance at this point. I've made arrangements with the school to take a leave of absence and return later, though I'm not sure when I can retake Class 6. Even when my injuries heal the other things that got me behind in the first place are not gonna be all tidily wrapped up within the next few weeks. You gotta wonder if this is one of those signs from the universe or Jesus or something, like I shouldn't be trying to start an animation career right now; I've already had to put it off for years, but maybe now's not good either. Who knows? If so, the message is clear: I want to go but the sign says stop. At least for the moment.

No Good Deed

Everyone hates taxes. But how much more suck would it be if you were taxed on double the wages you actually get paid?

That's exactly what my situation was for my 2005 taxes and this year will likely be the same unless I can find a way to do something about it! Tax experts I've talked to about it can't give me a solution (even one with 20 years of experience with the IRS!!). I'm sure other caregivers are in a similar predicament, as well. All because of a nasty little piece of crap called "share of cost". It's sort of like a deductible for Medi-Cal and other services elderly and disabled people (like my parents) qualify for. The job of taking care of a family member (or two in my case) is extremely difficult, even without a bunch of government bs. All I'm trying to do is make my parents' lives better, but I get hit will problems left and right thanks to bs like this.

The tax thing is just one of about a half-dozen headaches the government has stuck me with. To illustrate the lunacy of this situation I made up the following interview. While fictional, it's based on a true story...

Interviewer: So, you are a care provider through the IHSS program in Sacramento.
Provider: Yes, uhuh.
I: So IHSS pays you on behalf of the person you take care of because they otherwise wouldn't be able to afford the care they need, is that right?
P: Yes. IHSS refers to that person as the recipient.
I: If a recipient's income is even $1 over a certain amount, they immediately have a large "share of cost". This is the amount the State of California requires them to pay before the State covers any of the cost, correct?
P: yes.
I. Does your recipient have a share of cost (soc)?
P:Yes.
I: How much is the soc?
P: $749
I: Can the recipient afford to pay the soc?
P: no. It's equal to about 50% her social security. If she actually paid me she would not be left with enough to live off of.
I: So you're not getting all the pay that you've actually earned?
P: no.
I: Really? But you still take care of her anyway. Why would you do that?
P: The recipient is my mother. If I didn't do it, she'd be alone, and she's unable to properly care for her self.
I: So she can't live on her own?
P: No, not safely. She's disabled and with her age it's easy for her to forget her medicine. Or fall.
I: So you work the hours, and only get part of the wages you earn.
P: Yes.
I: Are taxes deducted from your check every month?
P: Yes. Federal and State, plus deductions for Medicare, disability insurance, health benefits and union dues.
I: And the deductions are based on your entire gross wages?
P: Yes.
I: including the $749 you don't actually receive?
P: Yes.
I: Wow. And what does IHSS say about that?
P: Nothing. They say they have to go by policy and government regulations.
I: Sure seems unfair to you.
P: yes it is.
I: you mentioned union dues. What is your union's reaction to this?
P: Well my union is United Healthcare Workers (UHW). They've never been any assistance to me at all with any problems I've had.
I: Really?
P: No. They always start going on and on about all the great things they have already done for me and other members, but when it comes to my individual issue, they're not interested.
I: Wow. How far have you pursued this?
P: Not far. I've already spent a lot of hours on the phone, on hold, getting the runaround with IHSS and the union. I'm a caregiver for my mom plus I have a part-time job to make up the $750 I don't get from IHSS. I don't have time or the energy to spend being sent in circles.
I: So what happens come tax time? What happens on your income tax retrun?
P: The $749 per month that I never see translates to $8,988 per year and is included in my gross wages listed on my W2. I have to claim that as income even though I don't get it.
I: And IHSS doesn't offer any help with that?
P: No. And they have a rule that if the recipient doesn't pay the share of cost they will be taken off IHSS altogether. Whether or not they can't afford to pay it is irrelevant to IHSS.
I: So, it's a program to help people who need care and can't afford to pay for it on their own, but if they can't afford to pay their soc they don't get any assistance at all?
P: No. None.
I: Freak! That's ridiculous. That's kinda like telling your 5 year old child you're going to take her to Disneyland, but she has to pay for half. What? nothing in the piggy bank? Well, she can't go at all then.
P: Yeah, I guess it is. It's exactly like that. And pretty much just as senseless and unfair.
I: So what do you do then?
P: What can I do? I just work hard, get only about half of what I earn, pay taxes on almost double what I'm actually paid, and try to help my mom have a safer, more comfortable life at home.
I: What would happen if you weren't able to take care of your mom?
P: Well, since my dad is no longer living, and my other relatives don't help out, I think my mom would have to live in a nursing home.
I: That would be expensive. Can she afford to do that?
P: Well, she is on Medi-Cal. She will still have a high share of cost but Medi-Cal would cover the difference.
I: Do you know how much that would be, total for her to live in a nursing home?
P: What I've learned is that the average cost for a disabled patient to stay in a nursing home is more than $60,000 a year.
I: That's a lot. And how much would the state be paying for you to take care of your mom in her own home, if they also paid the share of cost?
P: About $1600 a month, so $19,200.00. But since they require my mom to pay the first $749 every month, the State is only paying $10,212 per year.
I: So, IHSS is a program designed specifically to allow a person in your mother's condition to live more comfortably by being taken care of in her own home rather than in a nursing home, and by doing so you are also saving the State at least $50,000 a year?
P: Yes.
I: And yet they won't help you with the share of cost problem?
P: So far no.
I: And you've explained to them what it's costing you in taxes? You've explained the circumstances?
P: Yes. Actually, they say they can't help because of the way policies and laws are written.
I: You're saving the State more than $50,000 a year and they won't give you any relief from paying taxes on $8,988 of wages that you never actually get in the first place?
P: No.
I: That's really not reasonable or sensible at all.
P: No. It's not right. It's wrong any way you look at it.

You'd Think It Would Work Better

I ended up having to go to ER last week. Luckily nothing seems to be seriously wrong, but further testing and orders to watch for key symptoms means I'm not 100% in the clear yet. If I hadn't had that benefits termination fiasco of the past 3 months, I would have set up a regular appointment earlier in the week and it would have cost zero (no copay). My copay for ER was $100!! Someone at IHSS owes me a reimbursement. Okay, pissedness aside, there was some good news: Apparently, my benefits are either already reinstated or were never actually terminated to begin with. ER could have cost way more. I go back for some tests this week and hopefully a) I'm fine and b) benefits are still in effect then.

I've been way, way, WAY out of the right headspace to animate and it's been a real drag. Every key I've set has seemed like garbage and I've been downright unproductive any session I've tried to work. I've got far too much on my shoulders right now and it doesn't put me in the best mood nor motivate me to create. I'm not ready to be the head of the family beast, but I'm responsible for every last thing, and there's no comittee of two (or more), just me trying to choose smart. It's all making my head spin. But tonight I took out some time for my AM short film, even though there are other more urgent things I need to work on.

One thing that irks me is, since I know 3ds max, but not Maya very well (except animating) I have to build parts for the car in my film in max and go through an elaborate process to get it all into Maya. Over and over. Even though I figured out the one and only workable solution for my sitch (save out to .3ds, then import to Maya 6.5 using bonus tools), it's kind of a pain. The interior of the car model doesn't have key features that I need for my short and each time I add new parts I have to re-export/import the car to Maya. Things don't always go well. In this latest version the windshield wipers flipped the wrong way and somehow I attached them to part of the window, which is now floating a bit to the left. (I've been trying to fix the wipers since the first export). You'd think it would work better than this since Autodesk owns both programs now.

There are things I can't animate w/out putting these props in. Luckily some of the shots are very quick cuts where the props just get bumped with a hook. But all this exporting and importing business slows me down, and is delaying my actually animating even more. I'm already so far behind.

They told us at the start of AnimationMentor it was not necessary that we know Maya, and they did show us how to animate in Maya. But on a short film where you work solo, so many things come up and you really need to know the program inside and out. I haven't had any chance to go through tutorials other than the ones AM provided, so I am pretty much clueless about everything in Maya except animating! My advice to any Maya noobs considering AM is you'd better learn the program well by the time you get to Class 6. It is an extreme handicap not being proficient in all aspect of the software you're using. Unless you have a lot of friends who know those things and owe you favors (I don't), you're on your own. I'd love to start animating, but now I have to go work on my hearing.

I Just Don't Know

I've had to all but abandon anything to do with animation assignments nearly the entire past six weeks of class. I'm not even able to watch the lectures anymore. It's no longer just a time thing (maybe I said that already, can't keep track). It's become practically impossible for me to do anything with my animated short 'cause of all kinds of poo that's going on in other areas. For example:

• I am preparing for a hearing next week to ask that my dad's "share of cost", which turns up as a deduction that cuts my paycheck by half (and which I still get taxed on!) be eliminated or reduced.
• I only received 1/4 the wages I earned in July because of a government error. Still have not received a call-back about when I can expect a correction.
• I've been alerted to a problem at the nursing home my where my mom is staying. Trying to get it resolved. This by itself is pretty stressful.
• I have been planning to schedule a checkup with my doctor, and finally got the time to do so. But last week my health benefits were terminated because my dad's case worker at IHSS and Kaiser took too much time getting forms handled. This was after I spent numerous hours and miles of driving to do my part to meet a deadline. Looking into the issue, I have learned no one can be held accountable for causing me so much grief.
• I had to write a letter requesting a Board Appeal after I received an unfavorable decision ten days earlier in an appeal in which I was denied unemployment benefits because I take care of my dad 24/7.
• I did not receive any of my wages for April through June because of an oversight by my dad's IHSS caseworker. Still have not got a call-back regarding the snafu.

This is just a small sample. There is some good news at least. My dad's meds seem to be helping him. My mom had some visitors recently--besides me and my dad--which cheered her up at least at the time.

Shot in the Arm

This is it! AnimationMentor Class 6! We're on the final stretch. I've decided, while waiting to decide (hehe) that it's really not practical to stop between Classes 5&6, cuz really it's more like just one big Class 5. While it's not ideal to try continuing, knowing I can't put in the minimum required time some weeks, stopping now is too much of a bummer. It's better to die trying than to never make an attempt.

There's no sound, but here is the animatic for my short (4.3MB, QT Sorensen3). Some of the camera angles are confusing and I definitely have changes to make for layout.

Sidetracked by cargiving responsibilities and behind on assignments I was about as discouraged as I've been since starting AnimationMentor. The emotional component of never being able to do enough for my+ mom and dad, and ongoing hassles with government "regulations" that deny them services they qualify for has been getting to me. So when I got a chance to see Cars a few weeks back, I got an amazing reminder of why I decided to be an animator. For a while it spurred me on. A zillion thanks to all the AM mentors, other animators and everyone involved in making Cars.

During the break after Class 5 I finally had a moment to go see Over the Hedge, too. Like Cars, Hedge had also been very high on my to see list because the animation style in the trailers looked extremely fun and amazing. I loved both movies immensely, but I must mention Hedge is definitely the funnier of the two.

Since my mentor works at PDI, I unintentionally hijacked my group's last Q&A when I mentioned Hedge in the discussion. Sorry. I have other questions for Jason, but they can wait for another time. And again, a zillion thanks to Jason and all the animators and others involved in making Over the Hedge. It was definitely inspiring and fun. Both movies looked like the characters were challenging and a lot of fun to work with, and it made me say, as I've said before many times, "This is what I want to do!"

Will This Guy Make It?

By now I have to ask myself whether I am gonna make it through the program at Animation Mentor. Approaching the end of Class 5 I am about 2-3 weeks behind! There's only a fixed amount of time to get things turned in, and animating 60 seconds at FINAL level in 12 weeks (for Class 6) is a challenge for all of us, even w/out being behind. My schedule has become so erratic and draining I have to really figure out a way to get the work done for AM so that I can at least make a passing grade. Of course, no one at AM, including me, shoots for anything less than an A.

The good news is I found a car model to use in my short. The fun thing is that it's a scion xA, the very car I drive in actual life! The catch is it's a 3ds max file and I have been spending a lot of time trying to get it into Maya with materials and surfaces intact (I don't have Polytrans or anything that might do the trick). You would think these two products would be more compatible. Still, I'm glad the model I found is in max b/c I need to add quite a few details that are missing from the car's interior and necessary for my short. I'm no rock-star modeller but at least I know how to use max's modelling tools, I don't know Maya's modelling tools yet.

Another moment of happy was dashed when I recently found a CD I have with some great sound effects for my film. No sooner had I discovered a couple useful sounds than the drive stopped reading the disc. When I ejected the CD it was cracked from the center out! Bummer. Not sure how it happened, but the disc is a goner. I called the software manufacturer (now Sony) for a replacement disc but they no loger make the product the disc came with. If anyone has the install disc for Sound Forge 6 that has "1,001" sound fx and can send me the sounds that would be great. (Since I own a license, passing the sounds to me should be totally legal.)

Meanwhile, I've collected some sounds using my miniDV camera, but we all know how noisy it is using sound from the camera's built-in mic. Since I'm behind on assignments I have not had a chance to cap and save out all the sounds as clips yet but hope to soon cuz my animatic is not that great without sound.

Will I make it? No telling for sure but I'm giving it a shot.

Enough is Enough

If you only want to read the part about animation, skip down to the happy ending under Luckily, AM Class 5 is going well.

Yeah, I know. One of the key things of becoming a great animator is having a positive attitude. I've been through a lot and I'm doing my best to stay positive...or at least pleasant when inerracting with people.

This morning I was told I will not get paid for most of the IHSS hours I worked in March! I was expecting my check to be smaller because my mom has been in the hospital and I'm not allowed to report hours if she's not specifically at home. Nevermind that I might have spent 18 hours with my mom in ER on the 19th, or at least 6 hours some days visiting her and consulting various health care professionals. The rules are set up in ways that deny fair compensation in certain circumstances like I'm in now. My mom was authorized for 24-hour care last November. Even though I frantically worked day and night to take care of her in the days leading up to her two recent trips to ER, the max IHSS will let me report in one day is 9 hours. I worked 80 hours over 4 days--I'm not exaggerating--and they'll only pay me for 36. I was on the phone all morning, looking for someone who will cut me some slack. My union rep was no help at all, which is normal, and I'm waiting to hear back from two other people. Since my mom came home for only 4 days last week then went right back to the hospital, I'll have a similar pay scenario this month. Enough is enough! Cross your fingers for me, please! :) I have tuition to pay.

I had to take my mom to ER again last Saturday and over the weekend I made the extremely difficult decision to place my mom in a nursing facility instead of returning home. She had been fine at the place she stayed at last month, and I'm hoping she'll adapt quickly at the new place. I'm still not sure how I feel about it myself. By the time I was at the age and had the income to consider venturing out on my own, my parents began needing support. Their needs slowly increased over the years until eventually I had to take care of them full time. So this is weird. I'm no mama's boy, but other than short stays with girlfriends over the years, I've never lived without either of my parents! Not having to take care of my mom 24 hours a day will allow me a long overdue chance to rest. My dad doesn't require nearly the amount of care she does, not to mention I'm only taking care of 1 person now instead of 2. Makes a big difference. Still weird.

Luckily, AM Class 5 is going well. The group I'm with under mentorage of Jason Schleifer is a lively bunch. We all seem to be having a great time and Jason is indescribably stoked about all our story ideas and the whole dynamic of our class. I was fortunate enough to come up with 2 story ideas, and everyone seemed to enjoy them in the Q&A Tuesday night, especialy the one about the cans. Even though I'll be doing the other idea for the assignment, it seemed unanimous that I do the cans one as a side project. Having nearly zero sleep in the past 3 weeks+ and using my voice so much I'd kinda got laryngitis. It was tough to present my stories in class with my scratchy voice, but I got through it. I'm waiting to descirbe the stories here until I can record my story pitch video, which is the upcoming assignment. Written text just doesn't convey the characters as well. By the time my voice clears up home stuff will have also settled down and I'll post my pitch here as soon as I can.

Sometimes when I'm frustrated with my assignments I take a break by messing around with Plastic Animation Paper. I like it because it's simple and a free download. This twirly finger test is one I did last November. It's nothing great, but before Animation Mentor I never would have thought I could even do something like this. Notice how much help the thumb needs, for example. Ick. QT Sorensen, 160k

Blocked on All Sides

The new quarter at AM has started and so far Class 5 is great. A schedule problem and last-second mentor switch (my new mentor is Jason Schleifer) meant I missed the first "mandatory" Q&A from week 1. I barely made the one last night. It was great hearing everyone's story ideas and bouncing them around. The ideas presented were good ones, with lots of potential to become great shorts. I finally found out in the Q&A that I'm in group two, which will present ideas next week. Good thing, 'cuz until just a few days ago I didn't have any clue what I would do for a story. Even now the two options I have are OK but not great. One of them is too long. The other needs a better ending. Classmates and mentor can help with that, so I'm not too worried about it. What I'm worried about is school itself. I don't know if I should continue under the circumstances. Let me explain.

Every new session, my life outside AnimationMentor.com has become increasingly complicated. Many of my options designed to aleviate complications have created further complications! Most of them are connected to my full time job as a caregiver, they have seriously affected my experience with AM, and are things I have little or no control over. I feel like I'm in one of those multi-sided D&D dice, each side with it's own exit door, but each door totally blocked by something. There are a lot of exciting things happening or in store for Class 5, I'm already missing some of them and it's only the second week! As I look down the road, it doesn't get any clearer, so I could miss even more. I am definitely not getting the full value of the course, and it's come to a point where I have to question if I'm wasting a lot of money. Out of my 15-second scene assignment in class 4 I was only able to "final" a shot or two. I just don't have the time to devote to AM because of other life stuff.

After 16 days in the hospital, my mom returned home Tuesday. She is doing "better", though physical therapy was only able to get her to a certain level while at the hospital. It is expected she will improve further and faster at home. I sure hope so. While it's good to have my mom home where she's much more comfortable, she has to be assisted every time she gets up. On top of that she's a bit disoriented, which is common, and the combination of things has kept me on high alert for the past 36 hours. We have a respite caregiver who is supposed to be able to take over for me so I can get a break (4 hours per week), but I had to just let her leave today because complications in laws and liability prevent her from doing any task related to my mom! Even though my mom is the parent who needs the most care! Because of the way it works, it is my dad who the respite worker is contracted for, because my mom is already on another program funded by the same California State agency. Even though it is a program that is supposed to provide relief for the caregiver (me), since they can only help my dad, I really don't get a break after all!

No Animation, Again

Once again my best plan for getting my animation done has been obliterated by things out of my control. As if stuff wasn't already insane, last weekend I had to take my mom to the hospital. She's doing better now, but having been a hospital bed since Saturday she's going to need physical therapy before she is able to walk without someone (me) helping her. Her doc said she would need more assistance than before. So rather than coming home when discharged she's going straight to a nursing facility for two weeks. After spending nine hours in ER Saturday, the week since has been all about consults with my mom's doctor, discussions with nurses, phone tag with the discharge planner, notifying relatives (most of whom don't visit anyway), and taking my dad to see her. Meanwhile, in other areas there are also phone calls to make and take, paperwork to fill out, appointments to make--I am solely responsible for every healthcare decision for both my parents plus myself. Hell, I'm responsible for everything. And in the background, my tax issue still looms, unresolved. This has not been a simple week.

I think I'm handling it all okay, trying to do a little at a time so it's bite size, but the stress probably has me right at the edge of losing my mind. I'm trying to do (or not do) things to keep my head from imploding (like blogging) and an unfortunate consequence of all this is that I can't concentrate very well creatively. There's little point trying to animate with so many other things running through my mind. It's totally non-productive. I don't know where this leaves my assignment, but it doesn't look good at the moment. I haven't even watched all of last week's lecture video. For weekly AM assignments I've usually found time and inspiration Thursday through Saturday, so I can only hope the ani-muse and extra-time genie pay me a visit in the next few days.

Playing Catch Up

It's been a crazy, stressful few weeks and this morning around 2am I finally got my 409 assignment done, a full 6 days late. Instead of continuing to refine the shots I worked on for week 407, I decided it would be a good idea to refine shots 1 and 2. There are some things I'd like to refine further, especially Green's lip sync. I've been having a hard time making the mouth do exactly what I want, so that is something I'll have to work on mastering. I had Tan animated to a degree, but after changes I didn't get him out of "swimmy" stage this week so I just have him hold in the second shot for now. I thought it would be too distracting. From here on out I will probably be intensely focussing on shots 3 & 4, though time-permitting I would also like to turn in finals of 1 & 2.

So yeah, life has been nuts. At least I'm finally getting some help. Of course, even that has complications because of well-intended yet seriously stupid laws. My quest for tax and IHSS trouble has finally led me to someone who is actually helping me instead of just giving me the phone number of yet another person to call. This person admitted my problem might not be fully fixable without changing some federal or state laws! But at least there might be some kind of workaround. For now that's enough to relieve just a bit of the stress.

Search Continues

I'm not sure when I will make time for animating this week, being it's Friday. I spent most of Thursday and today taking care of family stuff, making phone calls seemingly to nowhere. I was up most of the night searching the Net for some kind of useful information for my tax fiasco and sifting through piles of papers and forms various agencies have sent me. So far nothing I've found pans out. As an example, one tax credit that could have helped ended in 2004. I am kinda stressed about this, not as if the deadline for filing is tomorrow, but just how little help there is out there for people in my situation. I'm sure I'm not the only one in this precockament. Why are the laws so screwy regarding this issue? Doing this seemingly futile search on top of ordinary caregiving duties is exhaustment on top of the usual exhaustion. I'm a bit too tired for it, but maybe I'll go out later tonight, try to forget about it for awhile. Then hopefully I'll find some energy to further refine my assignment before noon Sunday. Sheesh.

Here's another WACoodle, again done in Art Rage 2. This one is a girl. Not that it's so great, but it came out better than usual. I find girls harder to draw for some reason. The way I've drawn her, can you tell which way her body is facing?

Fence

Good grief! The huge storm we had last month tore up our fence, which is more than 20 years old. 60mph- gusts had pushed the rainsoaked fence to a 45-degree lean into our yard, threatening my dad's rose bushes and a yellow flower I planted last year for my mom. I had gone out in the extreme rain and propped up the fence with whatever wood stakes and metal rods I could find that my dad had laying around. The fence hadn't fallen all the way and a few weeks ago when a contractor came to make measurements he had propped the fence upright. After another heavy but shorter storm Wednesday night, the fence collapsed at 2:30 this morning the other way. Luckily the neigbors didn't have any plants along their side of the fence to be squished. Fortunately, my mom's yellow flower plant was not injured.

Back to the Drawing Board

My scene takes place in a jungle and I've been wondering how I'm going to do the jungle set for the final version. I could try doing it with geometry. I could build the set in max and import it into the Maya scene (I don't yet know how to model to that level in Maya). But have you ever tried to model a jungle? That could take a long time and leave little time for animation. Not only that geometry would slow down work and rendering. Instead I decided to grab some frames out of the movie my audio is from and make some clean background plates using Photoshop and some compositing tricks (nothing fancy). This was also the first time I had really looked at the scene from the movie since starting the assignment and it was interesting to see how it was covered in the film.

Since I was only working on a section of the scene this week I went ahead and tested the lighting and rendering, to get an idea if everything would blend. Most people seem to like it a lot, including Ike.

I apparently went off course a bit on the animation. Ike said I've got too many keys and in one shot, too many poses. After getting consistent grades for the past 6 weeks, for this assignment I suddenly dropped a bit. So I've got a tremendous amount of work to do on the scene, taking out some keys and some poses and replacing them according to Ike's advice. Should make it much stronger. Ike wants me to have Tan Bishop do his turn around using his left foot as the pivot rather than the right foot the way I've animated it. When I acted it out, it seemed more natural doing the turn with my right foot planted, but if done well it will probably look smoother the way Ike suggested. This will require some adjustments of the camera or Bishop's starting position and some other things. So it's back to the drawing board, or back to the computer since it's a 3d scene.

Orangutans Are Not Monkeys.

As a kid I used to always draw monkeys. When I lived in the Philippines I even had a pet monkey. His name? Monkey. That's before I knew about the Department Of Redundancy Department. Anyway, I WACoodled an orangutan, which is not a monkey. Orangs are apes.

I finally got a chance to watch Victor Navone's lecture from last week and all I can say is wow! I'm not sure which I was more impressed with, Victor's animation talent, his skill with the graph editor, or the fact that our school rocks for having this kind of stuff in the curriculum. Hopefully I'll get a last chance to watch at least part of it again. I think it's 2andahalf hours long!

Since Maya was giving me grief I took a break from 3D and was messing around in Plastic Animation Paper 4.0 beta. I had clicked over to AM classmate (though currently on a leave of "AMsence"...isn't that hilarious?) Robert Casumbal's blog and was inspired to do my own flour sack test (QT h.264, 50k). Okay, I copied him, but my test is way different. I've done one other sack test before this one--I tried to do a walk--and I am still confused about how a character with no legs should be drawn walking. Better look at some reference. This test isn't a walk, it's just sort of a hero sack going from a one-arm-up, semi-relaxed state, to a "super" pose or something. I didn't do much planning at all and it shows. I should get that Wayne Gilbert book Robert mentioned soon. Looking at the test you will likely see that frame 9 is lame-o. I wasn't sure what I wanted to do there, so if you have any suggestions on that drawing or any of this let me know.

The rest of this blog is unrelated to animation. Feel free to skip it.

I contacted someone at a senior resource Thursday to try to get help with my IHSS share-of-cost/income tax fiasco. (Incidentally, as big a fan I am of the game smush I haven't come up with a smush that combines tax and fiasco in a way that pleases me or I would use it here. Probably has something to do with their meanings.) The lady told me outright that one of the possible avenues I was hoping to explore would be a dead end. Sounded like she was speaking from actual experience, too. But there is a completely different route she told me about that, if she's correct, will resolve the tax problem. The share of cost will not be relieved, but solving the tax thing is huge. It's a somewhat exotic idea, but its oddity isn't gonna stop me from trying it. Friday I left a message with my mom's IHSS caseworker to get this plan rolling. If not for all this complication and nonsense I'd probably already be enjoying my tax refund.